Taking the plunge ....

I'd love that. Love history, wish I had a brain for it. As it stands I can barely remember what I ate yesterday. (wait, did I eat yesterday?) BTW mailed out ittyputer today.

Cool beans!

Oh SUPER!!!!

Yay!. Are we going to need to basket the Itty thread?

Yup, good idea.

I worked with a guy who met his wife online.
He was the happiest man alive in meeting her.
Unfortunately he died being diagnosed with Lung cancer a few years after getting married.
So it does work for some.

I don't think church is any different than meeting a person anywhere else.
I'm cautious about christians as well even tho i am one.

The scariest thing is getting involved with a man and having him belong to some weird cult finding it out later on.
But dumping them is always an option.

Not if the pod people suck out your brain first.

TigersEyeDowsing wrote:I'd love that. Love history, wish I had a brain for it. As it stands I can barely remember what I ate yesterday. (wait, did I eat yesterday?) BTW mailed out ittyputer today.

I forgot to check this thread....so sorry it took so long to reply! Anyway, I can't remember historical facts very well either. However, when you live it, it kinda "sticks" if you know what I mean. Weird facts stick with me....like the #2 cause of death in women (#1 being childbirth, of course) was fire! This makes perfect sense when you're wearing a long skirt and trying to cook a meal over an open fire!! I am full of crazy facts like that.....just don't ask me what battle took place, who the general was, or when it all happened!

TigersEyeDowsing wrote:Not if the pod people suck out your brain first.

Yeah lol.

I'm dating someone I used to work with.. known him for nearly 10 yrs.
It was sort of weird to date him after being friends for so long.
At least i feel he'd be faithful. Been seeing him for about 4 mo's.
He's a born again christian but he has no strange beliefs that I know of..

Corrigan37 wrote:

TigersEyeDowsing wrote:Not if the pod people suck out your brain first.

Yeah lol.

I'm dating someone I used to work with.. known him for nearly 10 yrs.
It was sort of weird to date him after being friends for so long.
At least i feel he'd be faithful. Been seeing him for about 4 mo's.
He's a born again christian but he has no strange beliefs that I know of..

That's good. Hope it works out for you!

So I managed to get myself engaged over the weekend

TY

So, are you going to bring her around so we can meet her, love her, and if necessary, threaten her with bodily harm if she breaks your heart?

Gorm_Sionnach wrote:So I managed to get myself engaged over the weekend

Yay!

sacrificialgoddess wrote:So, are you going to bring her around so we can meet her, love her, and if necessary, threaten her with bodily harm if she breaks your heart?

She's not really the forum type... but we've been going out for over 6 years, living together for a little over a year, so...

Gorm_Sionnach wrote:So I managed to get myself engaged over the weekend

Congratulations!!! Whoo hoo! I am very happy for you both. I hope you enjoy this exciting time.

wontgetfooledagain wrote:Any other 40+ single people out there?

Present and accounted for. I am queer, but the methods should be the same even though our orientations differ. You knew me as itsacru on Bnet, by the way. MaineCaptain told me of this place via PM.

wontgetfooledagain wrote:
I need ideas.

Ok.

wontgetfooledagain wrote:

I have no interest in doing the online dating thing.

I also don't do the bar scene

someone told me that churches are a great place to meet women.

where do I begin?

Ditch the idea that any given 'place' is a great place to meet women. There is no such place, because every place you go is such a place.

Ditch the idea you wish to date. Your only goal is to play a numbers game. The more new people you meet, the greater your chances of meeting potential partners. You won't be dating anyway until you've met those potentials. So your goal is to meet as many new people as you possibly can. Dating comes later.

What are your interests? What skill or hobby would you like to learn? Go take or TEACH classes in your interests. Check local colleges for non-credit adult education courses, either to teach or attend. (A song in 4 chords - Care to teach a non-credit adult education class in that and get PAID to do so, while meeting new people?) If you know little about cars, take classes in simple car maintenance. (It might be worth it to take such a class even if you know enough about car maintenance already.) Is there any work you need to do around your home, such as repairing holes in drywall or painting? Home Depot gives FREE classes on the weekend. (Don't laugh. There's alot of single women who live alone and wish to learn how to do car maintenance or simply home repair/maintenance themselves. Where do you think they go to learn?) Find atheist discussion groups in your area. Check your local area papers for classes in hobbies, crafts, sports, social groups, etc or anything else you might be interested in. Join a bowling league or poker group or something similar that matches your interests. Pick your favorite causes and do charity work to support those causes. Put the word out amongst your friends you are available and by that I mean your close friends who know you well and know your personality. Put the word out amongst your kids. They have friends who have divorced or available moms I am sure. Determine how many nights of each week you are willing to be out socializing around your interests and stick to it. The more nights you are out and about being cosmopolitan, the higher your chance of meeting potential partners.

Why do any of the above? First of all, none of the above involves dating, so there is no pressure. Second, every person you meet will share at least one of your interests, providing common ground for conversation from the get go. Third, you get the chance to not just meet new people with common interests, but also OBSERVE them over a period of time. How does that 44 year old hottie act when she is late getting to class? Is she merely flustered or does she get really mean? How she deals with her frustration will let you know how good of a match she might be for you, BEFORE you ever ask her out on a date.

When you are out and about meeting these new people, limit the conversation about you as much as possible and keep the focus on them and their life as much as possible. Sure it might turn out the 40 year old is in the middle of a divorce (making her off limits due to possible drama or if you don't want to be rebound guy), but if you keep the focus on her and her situation, you might discover she has a sister who was divorced 4 years ago and ready to get back out in the field. Don't ignore the guys either. They have sisters, while the younger guys might have single moms.

It's a numbers game. If each person you meet in one week knows ten people and you meet ten people in a week, your circle of aquaintances can go from zero to 100 in 7 days. But you won't ever hear about who else each person knows if all you do is talk about yourself and your life, so make it a point to keep the focus on them. They will walk away from the conversation thinking you were HIGHLY interesting when you let them go on and on about themselves anyway.

If you are the type who keeps blinders on while shopping (like I have a tendency to do with the get in, find my items, get out as quickly as possible mentality) you could well be missing MANY opportunities. Slow down and don't rush when shopping. You will be surprised at how many people check you out as you shop, even though you are in your mid-40s.

Final Words: Once this numbers game pays off and you are actually dating, pay close attention to how they handle anger. For me at least, there is no better sign as to long-term possibilities than how they deal with anger.

Keep us posted and let us know how it goes.

YAY! Welcome HappyKweer, formerly known as Itsa!

When I got an email that HappyKweer had joined I about spit coke out my nose.

Its good to see you again, old friend. I've wondered about you of late.

Oh Tiger, with me it was my Tea
I am sorry,

but it is a cheerful name

DANG! I feel so welcome and all, being greeted by not one but TWO Admins after my first post. Thanks for the heads up MaineCaptain! And TigersEyeDowsing, how are things in Asheville? I am not in NC presently, but in the ATL for the past two months (long story). I hope all of you have been VERY well since we last chatted.

But back on topic. wontgetfooledagain is too HAWT (not only in looks but also ATTITUDE) to be single. I don't expect his problem will take long to resolve and when it is resolved, he will have one LUCKY lady!

Heya. Things are well in Atown. I decided to go back and finish getting my associates this year (pause for effect) oooOooo... otherwise not much has changed. Well, stuff has changed, but yaknow, nothing noteworthy. I have a stray cat we've been feeding who's had 8 kittens in my basement. Been considering taking the pluge with Rob (well, not WITH Rob), but into the dating game, and I've lost the game of numbers. I thought going back to school surrounded by hotties would open some doors but, naturally, anyone I've been interested in is taken.

I thought about you yesterday and wondered if we'd ever hear from you again.

TigersEyeDowsing wrote:Heya. Things are well in Atown. I decided to go back and finish getting my associates this year (pause for effect) oooOooo...

Congrats!

TigersEyeDowsing wrote:I have a stray cat we've been feeding who's had 8 kittens in my basement.

AWWWW! A kitty AND kitty babies?

Damn strays know a sucker for kitty love when they find us. There's one outside the door here that has had me wrapped around it's finger for a week. He's even got me trained to his preferred feeding schedule, as well as which time of day he prefers dry and canned! How does that happen in 7 days time? (I won't even mention the stray back home that chose me as his slave some years back.) If people did this to us we would hate them, but cats know how to play us.

TigersEyeDowsing wrote:
Been considering taking the pluge with Rob (well, not WITH Rob),

I almost had a vision of loveliness! Thanks!

TigersEyeDowsing wrote:
but into the dating game, and I've lost the game of numbers. I thought going back to school surrounded by hotties would open some doors but, naturally, anyone I've been interested in is taken.

Don't feel badly. I have thrown myself out there for the past year and a half. I get bites all of the time, but there's that missing 'thing,' ya know what I mean?

TigersEyeDowsing wrote:
I thought about you yesterday and wondered if we'd ever hear from you again.

I'm like herpes. I keep coming back, when you least suspect.

good gracious

you two...... And ditto about the cat thing, boy its hard to type with a cat in your lap